Remembering...

38 years of God's BLESSING over my life...

I spent my birthday caring for my sick husband, loving on my children and fixing two meals!

My inlaws and brother in law surprised me the evening of my birthday with a visit and this delicious cake.  Was the BEST birthday gift ever!  Enjoyed their visit to the full.

I just love us!

Remembering my long hair and how it is no more...

BEFORE

AFTER

My new LOOK

Remembering how I fell in love with succulents while in California this past summer and enjoying my first tiny one...

Renee, this is for you!  I haven't killed it...yet!

Remembering how 2 years ago he came into our world and we have never been the same...!

Movie with mommy!

He loves to turn up the music LOUD and feel the vibration on the speakers.  Yup, it is in his blood.

Then he dances to the music.... ON TOP OF THE STOOL!!!

 

His first day at pre-school he came home all decked out as a soldier but as you can see, we got rained on (drenched would be more accurate!) and the rest of his 'uniform' was ruined.

Yesterday (Sunday) we celebrated Noah's 2 birthday with my husband's immediate family.  I was so incredibly behind that my nephew and his girlfriend very sweetly finished the cake for me by making the little flags.  Thanks, guys!  You saved me this time!

My samo, samo chocolate cake that is everyone's absolute FAV and buttercream frosting.  The cake has no stabalizing dowls in it (for the simple reason that this amateur cake decorater doesn't own any yet!) so I paid for that with my four layer cake listing unbecomingly to one side and the second batch of frosting was a bit runny...but oh well.  My son will know his mother loved him enough to make a cake (that was delicious by the way!) but that she was not a professional cake decorater!

We enjoyed watching him enjoy the whole singing, candle, cake cutting process this year.  Last year he could have cared less about it all.  This year he seemed to understand we were celebrating HIM!

He blew out the candle all by himself and was so proud of that fact!

Remembering today on his actual birthday, how two years ago he came into this world and brought with him much JOY, BLESSING, LAUGHS, CONSTERNATION, near HEART ATTACKS and millions of opportunities to practice the discipline and art of PRAYER!  How we love him.  How we trust that he will indeed live up to his biblical namesake and be a man of integrity in the midst of a very corrupt generation.

And last but certainly not least, remembering Barbara Ann Peters Gish.  My maternal grandmother and a woman who had an immense influence on my life.  She went HOME this past Saturday, September 12, 2015.  She is finally free of the pain and heartache that has marked her life the past 11 years.  She just never quite recovered after losing my grandfather, but today is at peace.  She is whole.  She is healthy and I believe happy beyond description!

How grateful I am for the many visits my children and I had with her this past May and June.

But can I be honest here?  I don't want to remember her wasting away in a hospital bed, too weak to lift her own weight.  I want to remember her like this:

I remember (if not ever so vaguely) staying at her house when my second brother was born so my mother would have help with the new baby and two small children.

I remember her calling us down from the huge tree house at their North Ave house to come have a snack and a break from our hours of playing.

I remember spending the night at her house and having her tuck me snugly into bed as a child and even later as a much bigger child making sure the bed was just so and I had enough covers.  And then waking up knowing Grandma would make a wonderful breakfast for me.

I remember LOVING to open her refridgerator because it was always full of yummy things.  And if it wasn't she got right to work making something.

I remember baking with her, cleaning house with her, working in her huge yard with her, shopping with her, canning with her.  Living life together: she had the patience of Job to put with us 6 oldest grandchildren: we were born one after the other in quick succession but I don't remember her ever getting impatient with us.

I remember devotions in the evenings and her reading to us.

I remember the stories she would recall of when my mother was a child.  

I remember the amazing outings she and Grandpa meticulously planned for us grandchildren. Oh.my.goodness.  Did we ever have marvelous trips: biking trips, Lake Tahoe, Mount Hermon, day trips to the ocean.  Each one was more fun than the last.  When Grandpa started taking the boys on trips, when Grandma got to work planning our girls' trips.  Now, as a mother I marvel at how she never seemed to tire of packing up, preparing for and hauling everything over to Mount Hermon. Taking trips is sometimes more work than staying home but she did it and did it well.  We ate well, slept well, played hard and had a marvelous time.

I remember Grandma's picnics: wherever Grandma was there was food and a lot of it.  It's funny the things one remembers but I remember her picnics.  They were always arranged beautifully, delicious beyond description and spread on her red and white checkered tablecloth.

My last two favorite memories of her well and happy are the following:

The big girl sleepover my cousins, Jolyn and Paula, and I had with her and Grandma Eunice several years ago.  We did everything we used to do as children: ate on the back porch and ate until we were sick, watched old slides of our mothers as children and laughed uproariously at them all, slept all tucked into her marvelous beds made especially for us and woke up to a sweet breakfast together. The pictures I have of that sleepover still make me smile and cry all at the same time.

And finally, a picnic my mother and I had with my two grandmothers in Del Porto Canyon.  I have no idea of the date or event now, but I remember her picnic, of course.  I remember the warm day and sitting there eating with three of my favorite women in the world, almost as if I had not a care in the world.  It is a slice of a memory.  I remember nothing more of that day but I remember sitting there eating Grandma's picnic.

I will miss her.  I already miss her.  But I am so glad she is at rest.  Her presence in heaven makes my HOPE even sweeter.

I would love to be in California right now to celebrate her life with my precious family but I am not. My place is here and that is good.  I am overwhelmingly grateful for the time I had while she was alive.  For the hugs and kisses.  For always knowing she adored me.  For never having to wonder if my Grandma had room in her life for me.  For the fact that she knew and loved my husband and met both of my children and loved them.  For the fact that while our family is large and her grandchildren and great grandchildren many, she always made me feel special.  She made me feel she was proud of me even when I chose paths very different from her own.  She was my Grandma.  Her mark and influence on my life will go with me for the rest of my life.


                                                                       Grieving but with immense HOPE,
                                                                                                 Jama